Going down...

Okies.. it's official.. I'm going back down again. Even my sheep notice it nowadays. That's how bad it is.

I'm sick sick sick sick sick of this life.

I THINK LIFE REALLY REALLY SUCKS.

I feel so trapped. I don't know how to carry on anymore.

I'm just so fed up of getting hurt, I don't want to care anymore. And I don't want people to care about me too.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....

When will things ever get better. I know being a Christian doesn't mean life's a bed of roses. But does that mean it's a bed of prickly thorns? I don't think God meant it to be this way.

Why do we keep messing up? Why do I keep messing up. I just want to go to bed looking forward to each new day and waking up, smelling the fresh scent of morning and looking forward to the day ahead. Then why am I filled with dread everyday?

I really really hate it.

Nothing seems to make anything better.

I really wonder if I should move from this house. Maybe things will be a little easier. Won't solve all my problems but might relieve me from a bit of stress.